Nikki: You know, I’ve lived in the Midwest, the East Coast — different places — and I have to say, I haven’t seen this level of community anywhere else. Back home, we lived in what you might call a society — my dad was a firefighter, and even though it was a big city, it still had that small, close-knit feel. Community and society are different words, but in some ways they mean the same thing — people who show up for each other. And that’s what I’ve found here.

During COVID, I did a yoga teacher training that was mostly online. We eventually met in person for a retreat, and I remember feeling like, “Wow, I’ve known these people forever.” People say Zoom can’t create real connections — but that’s not true. It’s not the medium, it’s how you build the community. And we did.

I guess what I’m saying is, I’ve experienced both sides — deep support, and at the same time, real struggles to be heard. Especially when advocating for someone I love, like my son. It’s strange — you can feel both held and isolated at the same time. That’s what makes “common ground” so complicated. It can exist and still feel out of reach.

My body knows it before I do — when I start feeling exhausted or off. I’m doing everything I need to do, I travel a lot for work, but eventually something gives. Some mornings, I just lie there and think, “I hear you, kiddo — I don’t want to get out of bed either. But here we are. Let’s go.”

That’s when you feel the difference. When support is there, it feels like grace. When it’s gone, it’s like the floor drops out.

Still, I stay grateful. Always. Like when my mom came to visit recently — I was like, “This year, I’m putting food on the table for you, Mom.” But nothing beats a mom’s cooking. She teased me, “You should come visit me, I’m getting old!” And I told her, “We will — just need to get through summer school first.” Life is full, you know?

So to me, common ground isn’t just about comfort. It’s about inspiration. It’s belonging, like Brene Brown talks about — being able to show up as your full self, and still be accepted. It makes me think about mentoring, and how much it matters — for students, for staff, for all of us. What kind of message do we send when we don’t protect the people who hold the place together?

Lately it’s felt heavy — state politics, university politics, even within our departments. But even then, I have my little crew. And that helps. People talk about self-care, but honestly, it’s not just about bubble baths and yoga. I read somewhere that the real solution isn’t managing stress — it’s eliminating it. And honestly? That would be a relief. Because even decompressing feels like more labor these days.

Still, I remind myself: I have more resources now.

Note: The transcript above has been condensed from its original audio recording to improve the flow and readability of the story.